It makes me sigh a lot that I am still talking about fat almost thirty years after I started to think I wasn’t ok how I was. But right now my weight loss is one of my successes after a period of time of feeling quite like a failure at everything.
So, I want to take a moment to celebrate my hard work. I decided to break my huge weight-loss goal into smaller chunks because I find it easier to motivate myself that way. My most recent goal was 2.6kgs by my birthday in mid-December. I think the world should know I only have 1kg to go and I think for this moment I am really rather neat. If I get there early then my next goal will be another 2kgs before the River Festival around the 20th January.
I need to get back into my training so I have kinda put that out into the Universe and am waiting for my six-foot-four, rippling bicep endowed personal trainer to appear scantily-clad on my doorstep some time in the next few weeks. I did go swimming yesterday and even managed a small ride this afternoon. Everything was easier than I was expecting so I am quite happy about that.
I really really want to do a marathon in March. My confidence in my ability to achieve this goal seems to fluctuate wildly but the intention itself has found it’s way into the reserved seating in my head that knows this is a have to not a that would be kinda cool. I do feel I need to try and find some positive voices in life that believe I can do it because it makes all the difference.
I am confused recently by how little time and effort I put towards the things I love. But I think I need to be patient, in the same way I have been with my weight loss, and let myself gently unfurl into this new life. So many parts of living are the best they have ever been. I feel the greatest rewards are going to come with time as one success builds on the next… well… that is… hopefully…
Because the last five years have seemed pretty fucked up!